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Archive for the ‘facts’ Category

The following is an excerpt from the July 1943 issue of Transportation Magazine. This was written for male supervisors of women in the workforce during World War II, only 60+ years ago! The intent was not to be “funny”.

Original entries (#1-50) created by:
Laura Luchau (laura@luchau.org)
(Laura’s homepage at http://www.luchau.org/ )

1. War sucks.
2. You CAN have too many women.
3. Smart people wear glasses.
4. Music foreshadows plot.
5. The less you care about sex, the more opportunities you’ll get.
6. (Inversely, the harder you try, the less you’ll get.)
7. When you die, make a long speech, and don’t finish the last sentence.
8. Snow means love.
9. The best teams come in fives.
10. In space, you can hear everything.
11. There’s always room for flashbacks!
12. When in China, listen to your tour guide.
13. The good guy always has the BLUE glow.
14. Speak quietly, pilot a big mech.
15. Believe in goddesses.
16. Teachers have excellent aim with small objects.
17. Vengeance with a mallet is the sweetest revenge of all.
18. Honor is sexy; villainy is irresistible.
19. Women are attracted to losers; men are attracted to ANYTHING.
20. The coolest weapon is still the sword.
21. The hero is never really mad until they hurt his girlfriend.
22. Female androids are sexy; male androids are….male androids.
23. The green-haired alien girl will always betray her people for the man she loves.
24. School uniforms are cool only when the collar is open.
25. A show without sexual tension isn’t worth watching.
26. Love knows no race, species, or logic.
27. If it’s homemade but tastes bad, grin and bury it (discreetly).
28. Never trust a huge corporation.
29. Romance never comes simpler than in a triangle.
30. Never fall for the girl who names her mech with a French name.
31. Never fall in love with a psychic.
32. You can never have too much hair.
33. Sweating is a sure sign of stress.
34. Daydreaming leads to accidents.
35. Everyone wants to conquer Japan.
36. The cute, fuzzy creature isn’t what it seems.
37. Cherry blossoms mean nostalgia.
38. Always take gravity into account.
39. Settings and faces are self-generating.
40. Losing your temper can be therapeutic.
41. There’s nothing sexier than high heels on a mech.
42. You can never have too many subplots.
43. If she sings, she’s doomed.
44. You always remember the sad endings.
45. Double suicide is romantic.
46. Outrageous vehicles only make the hero cooler.
47. Nothing delays romance like unruly neighbors.
48. Fancy ice cream is for girls only.
49. The most virtuous character will die.
50. Hot water has innumerable benefits. (more…)
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1. Save the whales. Collect the whole set
2. A day without sunshine is, like, night
3. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
4. I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
5. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
6. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
7. I feel like I’m diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
8. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
9. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.
10. Honk if you love peace and quiet.
11. Remember half the people you know are below average.
12. Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how popular it remains?
13. Nothing is foolproof to a talented fool.
14. Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.
15. He who laughs last thinks slowest. (more…)

All you ever needed to know about work.

1. A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and hours are lost.
2. If you tell your boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
3. The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don’t want to be seen with.
4. When you try to prove to someone that something won’t work, it will.
5. As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
6. Anything is possible if you don’t know what you’re talking about.
7. Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.
8. Technology is dominated by those who manage what they do not understand.
9. The opulence of the front office decor varies inversely with the fundamental solvency of the firm.
10. The attention span of a computer is only as long as its power cord. (more…)
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1. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
2. Movie nudity is virtually always female.
3. You know stuff about tanks.
4. A five day vacation requires only one suitcase.
5. Monday Night Football.
6. You don’t have to monitor your friends sex lives.
7. Your bathroom lines are 80% shorter.
8. You can open all your own jars.
9. Old friends don’t give you crap if you’ve lost or gained weight.
10. Dry cleaners and haircutter’s don’t rob you blind. (more…)
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1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.

2. You haven’t played Solitaire with real cards in years.

3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.

4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.

5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don’t have e-mail addresses.

6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.

7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.

8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn’t have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.

10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.

11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )

12 You’re reading this and nodding and laughing.

13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.

14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.

15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn’t#9 on this list

AND NOW YOU ARE LAUGHING at yourself.

Go on, forward this to your friends. You know you want to.

真係玩到無o野好玩，用微波爐亂叮一餐，睇o下有咩效果？

http://www.u-starvin.com/micromaniac/index.html?item=christmasLights

注意：千祈唔好亂試，好易搞出意外!
Warning : DO NOT attempt at home!

fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too.
Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe can.

i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno’t mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!

If you can read this, your brain is 50% faster than those who can’t

After visiting the following website, you will understand every number has it’s own uniqueness, a list of distinctive facts.

http://www.stetson.edu/~efriedma/numbers.html